Running | My Story

Skeptical.
Anxious.
Enthused.
Weak.
Discouraged.
Renewed.
Determined.
Strong.
Powerful.
Proud.
Fatigued.
Injured.
Uncertain.
Apprehensive.
Hopeful.
Ready.

Since I began running, this has been my flood of emotions. However, despite the roller coaster, in the last ten weeks, I've run four times per week without fail. According to what I've logged on Dailymile.com, I have covered 133 miles and have burned 112.23 doughnuts. Technically, I could say I've never eaten a doughnut in my life (of course, then I'd have to admit to the few extra glasses of red wine and Mini Reese's Peanut Butter Cups I've enjoyed recently)!

My journey thus far reminds me of a tip given by my parents when I was in middle school. "The people you associate yourself with quickly define who you are and who you will become." It's a lesson that is even more poignant to me now than it was then. I joined Stroller Strides last October merely hoping to get into better shape. Little did I know, I was surrounding myself with inspirational women who weren't afraid of a challenge. When the topic of joining Running Club (with a race in mind) arose, I distinctly remember one of them saying, "I'll do it, if you do it." To which I responded, "I'm really not excited about running, and there is no part of me that wants to run a half marathon." Dare say I was a bit negative? But the truth was, there has always been a small part of me that wished I was a runner. So I signed up with the 5k race as my goal. And before I knew it, the runner's high began to kick in. I was proud of myself. Proud to be there, rather than on my couch.

We started out easy, running 60 seconds, walking 90 seconds for 20 minutes. Honestly, even that was a challenge at the time. But I showed up, despite the few days there was snow and ice on the ground, and the other days when it was pouring rain.

The weather conditions actually proved to be invigorating; I was doing something I would have called crazy just a month prior.

I've never been much of a team sports player. I prefer to challenge myself when no one else is watching or comparing. But Running Club has provided the perfect opportunity to push myself while building commoraderie. I have two buddies who consistently run with me, both beginners. But we've worked through the dread, we've motivated through the breathlessness and we've built pride through our accomplishments.

Six weeks into the program, we were still doing a run/walk mix, and that Saturday we were scheduled to run 2.5 miles straight with no stops. Anxious about our upcoming challenge, we even "celebrated" our last "walk period", savoring it with pride and a fair bit of apprehension. I remember that last run/walk day more than the actual 2.5 mile run. We were still in disbelief that we could do it, even though we had been able to follow the training schedule thus far. Two and a half miles sounded RIDICULOUS. And now, only three weeks later, we have completed a 6 mile run!

Needless to say, I skipped the 5k race and signed up for the 10k (6.2 miles).

All of this progress has not come without complication. I'm struggling with a fair amount of knee pain and a few other aches here and there. It's disappointing to put in so much effort, to resist inertia, to show up and then have set backs. But that is part of life, right? I might not appreciate the ups without a few downs along the way. And in the process, I'm becoming more educated. I'm learning that to be an athlete (dare I call myself that) requires maintenance. And that may be a blessing in disguise, because maintenance involves self awareness, honesty, knowledge and attention. It's not just about driving the car, it's about valuing it.

(Had to include a couple cute pics of my running partner... discovering the awesomeness of having her own personal music player.)

This weekend, on Mother's Day, I'll awake around 5am, drink water, eat oatmeal, prep, and drive to Everett, WA to run my first race. It will mark the beginning of what I hope will be my running career. Certainly an accomplishment, but I already know it's well within reach. It even sounds, dare I say it, easy, because I'm already looking forward to the next commitment. On June 25, I'll be participating in the Seattle Rock N' Roll, a half marathon (13.1 miles). Insert that list of words I mentioned at the beginning of this post, because I'll be feeling them all over again over the next two months!

Stay tuned...
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"Your biggest challenge isn't someone else. It's the ache in your lungs and the burning in your legs, and the voice inside you that yells "CAN'T", but you don't listen. You just push harder. And then you hear the voice whisper "can". And you discover that the person you thought you were is no match for the one you really are."  

(A quote from the Facebook group, I <3 to run) 

Cheers to Best Friends

What I love about friendship is that it offers variety. There are the friends who are full of wisdom and give great advice, and then there are the attentive listeners who know when advice is not really what's wanted or needed. There are the partiers who always know how to have a good time, drawing you out of your comfort zone, and then there are the friends who don't need to be entertained and for whom your company will always be enough. There are the friends who challenge you, living ambitiously and inspiring through good example, and then there are the troubled ones, down on their luck, but who willingly accept your help and guidance, giving you a sense of value and worth.

I remember struggling as a child with girlfriends who were envious of others' friendships. It's a natural human tendency to want to connect and fit in - oh, to be popular! But I believe, to some extent, what set me apart was the realization that I didn't have to be best friends with all of my pals, and if one of them had another close friend, it wasn't a threat or something to be taken personally. Instead I understood that each person had something particular to offer, and like them, I couldn't be everything, I could only be myself. I was a good listener, but not necessarily a great conversationalist; creative, but not athletic; sometimes a leader, but mainly a follower; not picky, selective or judgmental, but on the other hand, not courageous or decisive. And that was okay. I exhibited particular traits and like a puzzle, my friends presented the corresponding pieces. None of them had to be everything, but each of them offered something unique.

Last weekend, my best friend from all the way back to the sixth grade, came to visit. We call each other "best friends" because our friendship has lasted the test of time. Knowing someone that long allows you to know one another in a way that not many others do. You know each other's parents and siblings and the house they grew up in. You know their background and therefore you understand the basis of their faults, weaknesses, strengths and aspirations.

(Trip to the OKC Omniplex, eighth grade)

Jennie and I are sort of like sisters. We've realized over the years how different we are from one another and we recognize that we both have other friends who can meet the needs that we can not fulfill for one another. However, we can share our deepest regrets without fear of rejection, and we can offer the truth even when it hurts, because we know it comes from a place of deep compassion and honest friendship.

(Ski Trip, 2001)

When Jennie came to visit, she was training for a half marathon which she'll run the weekend before I run my 10k. All my life she has been an example of determination. While I was doing my intervals of 90 second run, 2 minute walk, she ran 5 miles! But the important thing was that she motivated me to get out there and do it despite the cold weather and snow!

Clothes shopping was also on our list of things accomplished. Jennie served as my personal Stacy and Clinton. She joked that anyone who found out she was giving me fashion advice would laugh. But I was tired of wearing mommy clothes on date night. So when it came down to it, I really needed her to push me out of my rut and add some spice to my wardrobe.

And finally, Jennie talked to me about "Doing". Stop over thinking, stop procrastinating, stop adding to the list of things required to finish a project. Just plow through, finish, and feel the glory of a lightened load (ie, one more craft project completed!)

Thank you, Jennie, for offering three of the puzzle pieces I've been missing for a while. Thank you for seeing me for who I am and, better yet, for seeing me for the best I can be.

White Running Shoes

I seriously can't believe I am about to do this, but I'm posting it on my blog, so I must be planning to follow through. I'm joining a running club with the goal of running either a 5 or 10K. I have never participated in any kind of running program in my life. In fact, I've never run over two miles. Yes, there was that one summer - I was 14, and I decided to think about joining track. I got up each morning and worked my way up to jogging the mile and a half distance that was my neighborhood. I thought I was doing good, until I talked to the track coach who said I needed to be able to run 5 miles (or some equally insurmountable distance) by the beginning of the school year. And that was as far as the dream went. Now I'm 18 years older. Wait, what?

Everyone I talk to blows this off as simple. "Stephanie, you can run three and a half miles easily!" Huh? I run two blocks at Stroller Strides, and I'm out of breath (we'll blame it on the stroller). Well the truth is, my cohorts at Stroller Strides are heroically signing up for a half marathon. So now my original goal of a 5K doesn't seem quite as far reaching as I thought. I guess I'll aim for the 10K (6.2 miles). 

The club starts Monday (Presidents' Day), and I seriously have cold feet.

These, however, are the assets in my court: 

1. Hilary. She is my Stroller Strides instructor and will also be the running club trainer. She has a great attitude and a contagious smile. She's encouraging and makes you feel like you can reach any goal you put your mind to. Now I can put her words to the test - it's nice to have someone else to hold accountable! ;)

2. A new pair of running shoes. I have never before been fitted for running shoes. And I'm now realizing it makes all the difference. As the first step towards convincing myself that I was joining this running club, I went to a shoe clinic at Super Jock 'N Jill in Seattle. This place is fantastic. There is no talk about price and no thought given to the appearance of the shoes. From the minute you walk in, they evaluate the way you walk, how your foot touches the ground, and what specific foot support you may need. They have you try on fifteen or so shoes, each time telling you to run up and down the hill outside their store to compare the fit. In the end, you truly feel like you have a running shoe that was meant for you. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

3. A support group. This one pretty much speaks for itself. It offers encouragement and accountability. Two things I must have if I ever want to reach my goal. I've already seen this work to my advantage during Stroller Strides. Rather than thinking about the effort I'm going to exert, I think about the friends who I am going to see. We challenge one another; this is evidenced by the fact that I am signing up for running club in the first place. Sometimes all you need is a nice, firm push! ;)

In the end, I've come to the conclusion that:

• I've never done this before. It's about time.

• It's going to be hard to fail when I have so much support. I really think I'll follow through.

• It'll be an accomplishment I'll always be proud of, whether running becomes a favorite pastime or not.

So there it is. I'm doing it. I'll check in and let you know how it's going in a couple of weeks. Have you ever participated in a race before? If so, give me some words of inspiration. I'll need to read through them forty or fifty times before each running club meeting.